Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
