I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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