Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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