I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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