There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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