Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Randomize
