Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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