Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
porn star boner night. come get it.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
