end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I can text with my tongue
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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