What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
