She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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