READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
