I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
