you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I need to calm my uterus...
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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