her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
