i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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