I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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