so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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