Only a mothe r could love this liver
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Randomize
