I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize