1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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