Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
