Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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