is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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