This girl is more easily done than said...
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize