He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
