Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
