DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
