the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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