So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
