well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
