Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
