oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
