Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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