you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize