I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
