sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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