You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
