Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
