Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
