im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
