OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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