try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
