Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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