and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize