is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
