I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize