I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
