he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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