I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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